So, my little sister (let's call her La Chihuahua) graduated from college this year and as a gift from my parents, she got vacation to Hawaii. (I think I got a George Foreman grill when I graduated.) Part of her "wish" wast to have her two older brothers (let's call one El Pez, and the other "yours truly") spend some time there with her. (I could only go for 1 week).

On my first day there we drove the famed Road to Hana. The drive, which only covers about 60 miles, took about 4 hours. The reason? Well, the road is "very winding" and consists of hundreds of curves and over 60 bridges, most of which are one-lane. The Road to Hana doesn't actually go anywhere (well, except to the small town of Hana, pop. 709). But the point of making the drive is not actually to go SOMEWHERE, but in the journey, the things you experience along the way.

Drivers are expected to be courteous to other cars, and for the most part everyone was which was impressive considering the road was full of tourists. The only "close call" we had was about 20 minutes into the drive when a dump truck coming from the opposite direction rounded the corner and was all up in our lane. Typically, larger vehicles honk their horn when approaching a curve to let approaching cars know. This jackass didn't do that and the next thing we knew we were literally between a rock (the side of the mountain) and a hard place (a 2-ton dump truck.)

I wish I had space for more pictures because I took a ton, but here are some of the more notable ones. The first major stop we made, not counting sight-seeing and picture-taking, was the village of Keanae on the Keanae Peninsula.

It was raining (it did for most of the trip), but in Keanae the weather made for a spectacular view of the lava-rock coastline with the crashing waves. Here we stopped by a small stand that was advertising freshly baked banana bread so we decided to pick some up as dessert for our picnic lunch later in the day.. My dad says he got out and asked the stand's proprietor if she had any and she grinned and said "Just took it out (of the oven.)" He brought the small loaf back to the car and it smelled so good that we couldn't resist. We sliced it up and it right then and there. I decided to go back and buy another loaf to actually keep for dessert. I walked up and said in my best country-boy accent "I'm afraid I'm gonna need another loaf of that bread." The lady replied "It's wonderful, isn't it?" Yes, it absolutely was.

Our next stop was Waianapanapa Park, which, like just about every other stop along the road, held a breathtaking view of part of the island's coast. We decided to go ahead and eat lunch here and were planning on visiting some of the freshwater caves to go swimming. Unfortunately, it started raining (it did this off and on all day) right after lunch, so we decided to press on to Hana and come back later in the day, hoping the rain would have stopped by then.

The final stop (with the understanding that this was a round-trip and we were going to be passing everything we had already passed on the way back) was the village of Hana. The beach at Hana Bay was a black sand beach, made entirely of igneous rock. It's appearance was that of crushed Oreo cookies (minus the creme filling) and it felt like walking on brown sugar.

After stopping here and a brief drive through Hana, we returned to Waianapanapa and checked out the freshwater caves. We all were fully intent on swimming in the cave but fortunately we were skipped by a couple of tweenage girls who wanted to jump in. They both shot out of the water like they were on fire, and started screaming that the water was cold. We decided we could wait until we got back to our condo and swim there.

The Road to Hana was an outstanding experience. It encapsulated everything most people think about when they think about Hawaii (quaint villages, rainforests, volcanic mountains, beautiful beaches, tropical flowers, waterfalls) and put it in one scenic drive. It doesn't cost anything, only time. I am usually the kind of person that focuses on the destination rather than the journey, and it was nice to slow down for once and enjoy the journey without really worrying about where I was going.

Tomorrow, Day 2: Snorkeling at Molokini.

I'm looking forward to my flight. When I leave I'll be in the air for 9 hours, but taking in to account time zones I'll have only spent about 4 hours according to the clock in an airplane. Coming back will be the same flight time, but I'll leave around 4 in the afternoon and will get in almost 13 hours later by the clock. I guess that's really as close to time travel as I'll ever get.

What this means for you, loyal reader, is that there probably won't be much in the way of meaningful content posted at this here humble blog. Not that there usually is, anyway.

I may pop in and post a sort of "mini-travelogue" if I get a chance. I've got a 2 hour layover in Dallas and I'll have to kill some time.

There are some fucked up people in this world, man.

Moveon.org planned a candlelight vigil outside the Capitol to coincide with the all night session. But it was not a publicity stunt.

Senator Dick Durbin's office sent aides to purchase toothbrushes, toothpaste, and deodorant to be delivered to GOP Senatorial offices along with a note offering "supplies for your sleepless night." But it certainly was not a publicity stunt.

Harry Reid ordered cots to be set up and reporters were alerted later in the day when beds and pillows were delivered. Democrats assured us this was not a stunt.

Last night, the nightly newscasts showed footage of pizzas and cots being delivered to the Capitol building. But this was not a stunt.

Democrats publicly acknowledged that they did not have the 60 votes necessary to pass the measure. But they reiterated, "This is not a stunt."

Then, Senator Mary Landrieu (D-LA) took the floor of the Senate, quaking, as Rich Galen so eloquently put it, "with as much righteous indignation as a Senator from Louisiana can muster," and assured everyone that this was, in fact, NOT a publicity stunt...

...while one of her aides planted this poster right next to her...

Stunt? What stunt?

Here's how serious the Democrats were about this all-nighter...

At 8:30pm, the Senate held a procedural vote, after which many Democrats went outside to join the candlelight vigils being held in the area.

At midnight with 78 Senators present, the Senate voted 41-37 to instruct the Sergeant-at-Arms to request all absent Senators to attend the proceedings through the night. However, with the knowledge that the Senators over the age of 80 could not possibly be expected to attend the entire session, Reid decided not to enforce this request.

Reid had planned on holding quorum calls at 3am and again at 7am. However, Senator Barbara Boxer (D-CA) implored Reid to push back the call to 5am, citing "Senatorial sleep deprivation." Reid agreed and did not hold the 3am call as previously planned.

At 5am the Senate again passed a motion to instruct the Sergeant-at-Arms to request all absent Senators to attend the proceeding. This time the motion passed 37-23...60 Senators present. Most Senators were napping in their offices, and some even went their nearby homes to catch some shuteye.

Bullshit: Getting a little more serious, now. Like when you see an commercial on television for a "buy 1, get 1 free" combo meal deal at Milo's Hamburgers, and when you get there the next day they tell you,
"I'm sorry sir, but that offer is only on the days the commercial airs, and the commercial is not airing today."
"That's BULLSHIT."
You can also add an extra syllable to "shit" in calling a buddy in a lie:
"Man, that bass I caught must have weighed 25 pounds. Took all damn day to reel him in."
"Bull-SHEE-IT, it was only about 2 pounds and you threw it back."

Crap: Reserved for more eggregious errors, like an especially bad officiating call during a football game. I know, most people would think "bullshit" is more severe. Blame this on my old offensive line coach, Coach Spears. When you heard this, you knew he was pissed. Sadly, I picked up this trait from him.
"Holding on the offense, number 53, 10 yards, repeat second down."
"That's CRAP!"

Bullcrap: Combination of the previous two.
"I'm sorry, Mr. Heavyarms, but you paid your credit card bill online at 10:01am. Our policy clearly states that payments made after 10:00am will be credited to your account the next business day. Since your payment was credited the day after the due date, it is late, and that's why we're charging a $39 late fee, raising your APR to 24%, and taking your firstborn son as an indentured servant."
"That is BULLCRAP!"

Horseshit: This is the absolute worst. Usually reserved for politics like statements by the Louisiana Democratic Party, George Bush's explanation of his amnesty bill ("It's not amnesty." -GWB), or anything coming out of Bill or Hillary Clinton's mouth.

Oh my God, smell them tires,
Someone save the baby, it's a trailer park fire!

How did the whole thing get out of hand?
I was burnin' spiders with an aerosol can...

Oh, my, my, smell them tires
Someone save the baby, its a trailer park fire!

Gotta get in there, kick down the door,
Daddy left his Harley on the livin' room floor...

Oh, my, my, smell them tires
Someone save the baby, its a trailer park fire!

Fire's out of hand, man, there she goes,
Only hope now's if the waterbed blows...

Oh, my, my, smell them tires
Someone save the baby, its a trailer park fire!

You save grandma, I'll save the crank,
We'll meet out back by the propane tank...

Oh, my, my, smell them tires
Someone save the baby, its a trailer park fire!

Spoiler Free Review: If you want a good way to kill two hours, or if you want to go watch a movie and then come out and think "Wow, I can't believe that movie actually lasted two hours," this movie is for you. For kids, this move has a few cuss words (bitch, damn, piss), a middle finger, a urination gag, and a discussion about masterbation (and they say "masterbating," they don't...uhh...beat around the bush.) If you can suspend disbelief for two hours, and you enjoy mindless romps where its not really important how and why things happen, you will probably enjoy it. The special effects and live action are essentially seamless, these are probably some of the best looking CGI rendered characters ever put on the big screen. Hardcore 80's Transformer fans, people who like their movies to exhibit some degree of intelligence, you may not like it so much.

WARNING!! WARNING!! SPOILERS AHEAD!!
Alright, if you're still here, I'm assuming that you are a Transformer geek, because you're who I'm writing this for.

In a voiceover at the beginning of the film, we learn about the Allspark, which is a mysterious cube (think Borg) that has the ability to bestow life on mechanical systems. The Allspark lands on the Transformers' home planet (Cybertron, unnamed in the movie) and creates the race of beings known as the Transformers. Eventually, two factions form out of these beings, the Autonomous Robotic Life Forms (Autobots for short), lead by Optimus Prime, and the Decepticons led by the megalo-maniacal Megatron (that was fun to say!) Eventually war between the two factions devastates Cybertron and the Allspark is launched into space so that it cannot do any more damage. The Allspark drifts through space until it crosses paths with Earth and lands in the Arctic. Megtron pursues the Allspark and crash lands in the ice to be frozen for millennia.

The protagonist of the film, Sam Witwicky, is your typical movie geek teenager. He's picked on by the jocks and wants a car to impress the girls (sound familiar, Peter Parker?). Sam (portrayed by Shia LeBeouf) has his eyes set on Mikaela Banes, played by the absolutely luscious Megan Fox) and of course the two eventually cross paths and become a pair for the rest of the movie. Sam, as it turns out, is the grandson of the legendary Captain Archibald Witwicky, who discovers Megatron and the Allspark frozen in the ice during an expedition to the Arctic circle. The US government constructs the Hoover dam to hide both Megatron and the Allspark.

Fast-forward to present day on board a US Army helicopter and a group of special forces members led by Capt. William Lennox (Josh Duhamel). The team is enroute to its home base after a mission. An intruder enters the airspace around the base. The intruder, despite repeated warnings, approaches and lands at the base. As the pilot is ordered to shut down its engines and the crew ordered out of the helicopter, we see that the pilot is actually only a hologram. The helicopter transforms into a behemoth robot (Blackout) that begins a systematic attack on the base. It eventually comes to the base's supercomputer and begins downloading files...

Back in America we learn that the Autobot Bumblebee is on Earth, looking for the Allspark, as are several Decepticons. Sam is selling some of his grandfather's items on eBay in a effort to get some spending money and apparently this is how the robots track him down. Bumblebee, in the form of a run down 70's era Camaro, finagles his way into Sam's ownership. One night, Bumblebee drives away from Sam's home and Sam, thinking someone is stealing car, follows him to an abandoned factory where he sees Bumblebee in robot form sending a signal into space.

Cut to Air Force One, we see a fairly innocuous CD player perched beneath the seat of a passenger. The CD player transforms into a small robot (Frenzy) and attempts to download files from Air Force One's computer. Frenzy is discovered and, after a shoot out with Secret Service Agents, forces the plane to land and sneaks off the plane. A police car drives up and Frenzy gets into the passenger seat.

Back in Qatar, our special forces team is fleeing their now destroyed base and are trying to get a message "to the Pentagon" about the robot that destroyed it. Unbeknownst to the team, a car-sized scorpion-shaped robot (Scorponok) was ejected by Blackout during his attack on the base and is now following the small team of soldiers. They eventually come to a small town in the desert and try to use a phone, but are attacked by Scorponok. They eventually contact the Pentagon and disclose their location but they have an intense fight with Scorponok, who is eventually driven off by a pair of A-10 Warthogs and an AC-130 Gunship.

The Autobots, summoned by Bumblebee, land in the town and meet up as a team. Sam and Mikaela learn of Bumblebee's true identity (after an attack on Sam by Barricade, the police car that met up with Frenzy) and they tell Sam that the pair of glasses that belonged to his grandfather he is selling on eBay actually have the coordinates to the Allspark hidden in the lenses and ask him to retrieve the glasses for them. They return to Sam's home and Sam asks the team to remain hidden (in vehicle form) in the alley while he gets the glasses. They get impatient and the movie's silliest/funniest/stupide st moment occurs as the five Autobots urge Sam to get the glasses while avoiding detection by his parents. Sam gets the glasses but at the same time his parent, he and Mikaela are taken in to custody by "Sector 7," the movie's unofficial, top-secret, "we do not exist" government agency who are aware of the Autobots' presence and are in charge of monitoring Megatron and the Allspark.

Eventually Sector 7 ferries Sam, Mikaela, the now returned and debriefed Capt. Lennox and his team, and a captured Bumblebee to the Hoover Dam to see Megatron and the Allspark. However, Frenzy has managed to stow away with the group. He infiltrates the base's computer system and releases Megatron. Sam, understanding the threat, persuades Sector 7 to release Bumblebee and let them try and get the Allspark back to the Autobots before Megatron can get it. They make the incredibly stupid decision to move the Allspark to a city to "hide it" until the military can come and pick it up.

Megatron is thawed out and exits the Hoover dam, where he is met by Starscream, his distrusted lieutenant. Starscream informs Megatron where the Allspark is being taken and Megatron summons his Earth-bound Decepticons, Barricade, Blackout, Brawl/Devastator, and Bonecrusher. This sets the stage for the film's climatic battle.

There, if that sounds interesting to you, you probably will like it. Here are the problems I had with the film.

There is almost no development of the Transformers characters. For the Autobots, we get a brief introduction to each ("Ironhide, my weapons specialist; Ratchet, our medic; Jazz, my trusted lieutenant," etc.) For the Decepticons, there is no character development at all which, for me, is the film's most egregious error. The Decepticons, traditionally, have always failed in their plans against the Autobots. Not because they were inferior, mind you, but because the Autobots worked together and the Decepticons always suffered from treachery, infighting, and backstabbing against each other. Even the film's toys give more background info on the characters than the film itself does. Starscream's toy bio says that he is ready to seize control of the Decepticons from Megatron, but in the film all we hear from Starscream is "I serve at your pleasure," and Megatron reprimands him with "You have failed me again, Starscream." The two characters originally served as antagonists to each other, with Starscream constantly seeking to usurp Megatron's leadership, but there is little evidence of that in this film. Likewise, if it weren't for a brief moment where each Decepticon replies to Megatron's summons with "[name here] rolling out," we wouldn't even learn of the names of half of his crew. There is almost no interaction between the Decepticon team. Other than their being simply very tough to bring down, they never really seem like much of a threat.

Then there is the design of the Transformers themselves. Yes, the original designs from the 80's were boxy and not very sleek, but they gave each bot character. Each bot's alternate mode (car, airplane, etc.) carried over design elements to the robot mode. Optimus Prime had a pair of smokestacks on his shoulders. Ratchet and Ironhide (both based on the same vehicle) each had a big ol' van windshield on their chest. But the new designs don't do that. The film's producers stated that they wanted to make the robots appear both more realistic and alien, but in doing so they completely removed the character inherent in each individual. Where the old design's had a recongnizable face, and more humanoid arms, the new designs just end up looking like a jumble of machinery. (For a comparison, check out the old and new Ironhide.) The new designs, in addition to Micheal Bay's fast-paced, up-close robot action, makes it very difficult to see what is going on on screen anytime the robots tangle with each other. With the exception of Bumblebee and Optimus Prime (and maybe Ratchet), each robot is generally the same color, a dark gray or dark green, that makes it difficult to distinguish one from the other. The old character's had recognizable features. If the face of one of the robots were flashed on screen for a second, you would be able to say "Oh, that's Brawl," or "There's Ratchet." Again, with the exception of Optimus and Bumblebee, none of the new designs are really distinguishable from the others.

Now I want to be nit-picky. I know, I'm harping on the realism of a movie about giant robots. But for me, if you're going to put an element into a film that is unbelievable, the rest of the movie needs to be as believable as possible for it to work. It's one thing if the film is in a fantasy setting, ala Lord of the Rings, it's quite another when its set right here in the good ol' US of A.

Our special ops team is shown pointing laser designators at Scorponok as the A-10 airstrike rolls in. Does the A-10 attack Scorponok with laser-guided munitions? Oh no, they go in with their massive GAU-8 cannon. The GAU-8 is optically sighted by the pilot and does not require a ground based laser designator. More importantly, the A-10's PRIMARY attack weapon is the AGM-65 Maverick air-to-ground missile which is guided by a camera in the nose of the missile. I could MAYBE buy it if this was night time, but it's the middle of the day in the fucking desert. A-10's, by nature, were designed to be as rugged and simple to operate as possible, not dependent on a bunch of ground-based systems. But that's fine, and minor nit-pick. People who didn't grow up studying airplanes probably wouldn't know that.

One error that REALLY pissed me off hit a little closer to home, though. During the scene where the Special Forces team is returning to base, the team members are reminiscing about what they missed most about home (as soldiers in the movies are wont to do.) One of the guys is talking about how he couldn't wait to get home and eat some of his momma's jambalaya and crawfish etouffee. Then he starts speaking SPANISH, the team members chastise him for not speaking English and he says that he can't help it, it's his culture. JAMBALAYA AND ETOUFFEE ARE NOT DISHES THAT ORIGINATE FROM A SPANISH-SPEAKING CULTURE! They're fucking CREOLE dishes and originated in Louisiana. Creoles typically speak a derivative of the French language, not Spanish. I know we've got to include the token Spanish guy in movies now, but make the guy want to eat his momma's tamales or something.

One of the things the producers said they wanted to avoid was the problem of "mass-shifting" where giant robots transformed into something larger or smaller than their mass in robot form would normally allow (for example, the 1980's Megatron transformed into a life-sized handgun, but was a 20-30 foot tall robot in robot mode.) The robots in this film still seem too large for their vehicle modes. What's more, the Allspark, originally seen to be as large as a multi-storied house, is shrunk down into a cube small enough for a human to carry. Mass-shifting, anyone?

At the end of the film, the humans and Autobots realize the importance of keeping the Allspark from Megatron. So what do they do? They drive it to the middle of a fucking city. And they drive through the middle of a giant, unpopulated desert. So, we want to protect humanity...where should we take this thing? Hmmm, I know, let's take it to the middle of a populated city and wait for a helicopter to come pick it up! Fucking genius!

There is a scene earlier in the film where Sam's dog takes a leak on Ironhide. Ironhide wants to shoot the dog because it's "leaking coolant." Sam explains that its okay, that some animals leak coolant and that it is perfectly normal. Later on, when the Autobots confront the Sector 7 agents, Bumblebee pops open some sort of valve in his pelvic region and "leaks coolant" on one of the agents (basically pissing on him.) I thought that this was a really stupid scene. I wasn't offended by it, I just thought it was incredibly, incredibly stupid. I guess piss jokes are what passes for humor in Michael Bay's films.

That's all I really feel like griping about now, but you get the idea. If you want a fun, brainless, 2-hour ride, then this movie works. If you're expecting something that has some substance, this ain't it. But then again, we're talking about a movie based on a cheesy cartoon from the 1980's, so I probably shouldn't have expected a whole lot in the first place...

We stopped by the small section dedicated as "Public Beach" just to walk in the sand and wade in the surf. I wanted to go swimming, but my wife won't swim in any water where she can't see the bottom, and I didn't want to leave her baking on the beach while my son and I played in the water. Neither of my kids were impressed with the beach much, anyway.

We decided to stop by the Dauphin Island Visitor Center to ask about a good place for lunch and two places were recommended "The Barbecue Stand down the road or Barnacle Bill's." My ears perk up whenever someone mentions Barbecue as the thought of smoke and meat makes my tummy growl, call it a Pavlovian reaction. We drove by and there was smoke billowing out of the joint's smokestacks, always a good sign that true "Barbecue" is present (BBQ ain't just plopping it on the grill and slathering it in sauce, that's only "grilling." BBQ requires three ingredients...meat, smoke, and TIME.) Unfortunately, it truly was a "stand" and there wasn't any place to sit down and eat short of a patio and a few wooden tables. We decided to head down to Barnacle Bill's instead.

The parking lot was full which is usually a good sign. We walked in and saw the "Please wait to be seated" sign and did so. Two or three staff members saw us and told us "Someone will be right with y'all." Another usually good sign. After about 5 minutes we finally got seated...and waited another 10 minutes. Our waitress eventually showed up and asked us for our drink orders, "Sweet tea all around." Another 10 minutes. My wife noticed on the menu that their motto was "The food's good...but the service sucks." Well, they were half right. When the waitress returned with our drinks we asked if there was a kid's menu. Our waitress replied "I've only been here two days. They tell me that the items on the back are smaller portions, so that's kind of our kid's menu." Okay, then.

The waitress kept constantly reminding us that she was new, as if this is a good excuse for dragging her ass. (Before you get mad at me, I waited tables for almost 3 years in college, and there's a difference between being a little slow, and just generally sucking balls. She sucked balls.) We ordered three burgers. We waited for almost 45 minutes. For burgers. We waited for our tea to be refilled. We waited for some ketchup. We waited for our ticket. We waited for her to bring back my credit card. We did a lot of waiting. We arrived at 12:45 for lunch and it was 2:30 before we got done. She mentioned that fries were extra with the burgers (which it did not say on the menu and was not told to us when we first ordered them.) I HATE when places do that. If you're going to charge me $6.95 for a hamburger and then ANOTHER $1.00 for the fucking fries, then just put $7.95 on the menu and give me the whole shebang. We ended up spending 35 bucks on three cheeseburgers and three sweet teas.

Suffice it to say, we won't be going back to Barnacle Bill's. Don't eat at Barnacle Bill's. Their service sucks. It says so right on the menu.

After lunch, we planned on visiting the Dauphin Island Sea Lab Estuarium, the Audubon Bird Sanctuary, and historic Fort Gaines but since lunch took twice as long as planned, we skipped the Bird Sanctuary.

The Estuarium was fun, it was a kind of aquarium and small walking trail along a coastal habitat. The aquarium mostly had the animals found in local waters; nurse sharks, sea turtles, jellyfish, crabs, etc. The walking trail was also neat because there was an enclosed salt marsh ecosystem, and you could look down in the water and see crabs and fish. The kids liked that.

Fort Gaines was probably the highlight of the day, though. The fort was built in the mid 1800's and completed by the Confederates at the onset of the civil war. It played a crucial part in the Battle of Mobile Bay (where Admiral Farragut supposedly uttered "Damn the torpedoes! Full Speed ahead!"). The fort is in great condition, and it took a couple of hours to tour the whole thing. It closed at 6 pm, and we got done right at closing time. Luckily for us, we arrived on a day when there was a real blacksmith giving a demonstration so we got to see him do some of his work. I can't remember his name, but he was fun to watch and did a good job explaining the various intricacies of his art. He even showed us how they used to make nails and let my son keep one, which he beamed over for the rest of the day.

It was supper time, and we weren't about to stop back at Barnacle Bill's, so we decided to head on back to Mobile for supper, rest, regroup and prepare for our next day.

First of all, the Alabama is NOT stroller friendly so if you're bringing along a child that isn't quite ready to walk on their own for a few hours you may want to make alternate plans. My wife was a real trooper as she packed my 2 year old daughter around for most of the tour (I have a bad back and can't carry her for more than about 5 minutes before my back feels like its on fire.) Between carrying her around when I could, the diaper bag and camera bag when I couldn't, and keeping up with my son, we were worn out at the end of the day.

The ship's tour is broken up into three sections:
Red: Below decks, aft part of the ship. Crew's mess/galley, crew bunks, etc..

Green: Below decks, forward part of the ship. "Marine country" (all large ships had a Marine detachment on board), Officer's quarters, Captain's Cabin, dentist office, sick bay, lower part of one of the 16 inch gun turrets, forward engine room, CIC, etc..

Yellow: Above decks. Main deck from bow to stern, multitude of anti-aircraft guns and batteries, plus smaller guns, interior of two of the ship's three 16-inch gun turrets, ship's superstructure (combat bridge, main bridge, officer's mess and galley, officer's quarters, Captain's Sea Cabin, etc.

It is recommended that you do the tour in that order, but I think it is better to change the order up and do the red (below decks/aft), yellow (above decks), and finish up with the green (below decks/forward.) The above decks portion of the ship isn't air conditioned all that well and you have to do a lot of climbing. Not the best way to end a 2-plus hour walking tour. While below decks can be a little warm in some places, for the most part there is air conditioning and you have the chance to cool off a little. In any event, the below decks/forward part of the tour is much more interesting than the above decks part because there is so much more to see. Also, the officer's mess is used as a rest area, and there are several comfy couches situated directly beneath some air vents blowing VERY COLD air. This area is situated so that it a perfect place to stop at the end of each of the three tours.

You also need to plan on spending a lot of time at Battleship Park. We arrived there around 10:30 that morning and didn't get done until almost 2:30, and about 2 and a half hours of that was spent actually on the ship. Once you're done with the Alabama, there is still the aircraft pavilion and the USS Drum, a WWII-era Gato-class submarine. The Drum tour isn't too long, only one of it's decks is available to tour, but it's still cool to see this cramped little boat.

The sad thing for me was to witness what devastation is still there from Katrina. The gift shop had several pictures of the damage immediately after the hurricane (you can view some of them here) and I was amazed at how most of it has been repaired. After the hurricane passed the ship was listing about 8 degrees to one side (doesn't sound like much, but you would be able to notice it.) Most of the damage done to the ship itself has been fixed and it was no longer listing.

I was really looking forward to touring the Aircraft Pavilion since I'm an aircraft fanatic. I was sad to see that around half of the park's aircraft collection was still damaged and not on display. I saw a P-51 Mustang missing it's vertical stabilizer (and most of its tail), and various other aircraft parked (including what I consider the pride and joy of the park's aircraft, an A-12) outside that suffered extensive damage during Katrina. In talking to one of the staff members in the Aircraft pavilion I learned that there was over 20 feet of water inside the Pavilion and that the aircraft just sort of floated around and banged into each other until the water subsided. While it was sad to see all the aircraft I remember being in such great condition so damaged and sitting off to the side, the real attraction is the USS Alabama, it the ship itself is fantastic condition.

For "Lupper" (too late for lunch, too early for supper) we ate at Felix's Fish Camp, which was right down the road from Battleship Park. It was one of those Gulf Coast seafood joints that sit right by the water with big picture windows so you can enjoy the view. My wife got Chicken Parmesan (naturally, since we were at a seafood place), and my son and I split one of their delicious cheeseburgers. The waitress, overhearing that we were going to split it, brought out the burger cut in two and on separate plates for us. Their service was excellent, but I found out here that Mobilians like their sweet tea just too damn sweet. I had to ask for a glass of unsweet tea to temper it a bit. The food was good enough, but at $30 bucks for three drinks, a cheeseburger and a chicken paremsan plate, it is a little pricey for your midday meal. Well, we did get a piece of some lemon ice box pie which, according to legend, "Mobilians ate a million slices of before Key Lime Pie ever came on to the scene." It does kick key lime pie's ass six ways from Sunday, so if you ever have a chance to try it...go ahead.

The second and final stop of the day was downtown Mobile to visit Mobile's Official Welcome Center (and also home to a 4:5 scale replica of one third of Fort Conde, (used for over 100 years by the Spanish and British to protect Mobile Bay), and the Phoenix Fire Museum (which houses authentic horse-drawn steam fire engines). Both museums were worth the visit and (even better) were absolutely free. I was sad to see that we were the only visitors to the Phoenix museum that day. I guess old fire engine equipment isn't exactly the thing most people want to see. My son loves old steam engines (trains) and we thought he'd like to see a steam-powered fire engine.

For supper we decided to order pizza from Hungry Howie's. We saw this pizza chain featured on Food Network and apparently the place is renowned for it's "flavored crust." We ordered their Garlic Herb flavored crust and some bread sticks. The bread sticks were the kind I like, buttery, garlic-y and slightly doughy. Unfortunately, the seasoning on the crust was burned. I could taste the garlic there, but I would have liked to have seen how it tasted without the charcoal aftertaste. The pizza itself was pretty good as delivery pizzas go (if you've ever eaten at a Mr. Gatti's or a BJ's pizza, it tastes similar to those). There are no Hungry Howie's in Louisiana, so I guess unless we go out of state I won't get to try it again any time soon.

Day 3 (and maybe 4) on Monday.

Day 1
Friday. We decided we'd drive in after I got off work, so we'd have the whole day ahead of us the next day. Nothing spectacular happened, which is a rarity for my family when we travel.

Day 2
First stop, the Mobile Zoo. This is actually a misnomer, as the "zoo" is not actually in Mobile, but in a small town called Wilmer which is about 30 minutes outside Mobile, and it is questionable if this could be called a "zoo" at all. We thought it would be a good idea to pick up some picnic-y type foods and eat at the zoo so we stopped at the first grocery store we came across, reasoning that I didn't know the area and there might not be another option. We walked to the lunchmeat section and started looking. As soon as we started pulling out packages dead flies started falling off the top of the boxes. We moved on down the road and found another (cleaner) grocery store.

The "Mobile" "Zoo" (Mobile in parentheses since it ain't in Mobile and Zoo in parentheses since...well, you'll see) was located down about a mile of gravel road, then a dirt path that brought us to a barn, right next to watermelon patch. This was a very rural area, with soybean fields and farmland, and some homes surrounding the zoo. The parking lot was grass. I asked my wife, semi-jokingly, "I wonder if this 'zoo' is just an elaborate ruse to lure unsuspecting out-of-towners here in order for them to be kidnapped and tortured by some hillbilly. She wasn't amused.

My hopes were rapidly diminishing. This zoo didn't have crappy animals...there were actually bears, monkeys, tigers, snakes, what you'd expect at ANY standard zoo. It's just that, well, the animals weren't in cages, they were behind fencing (double layers of fencing in the case of the larger animals) Don't get me wrong, I didn't feel unsafe at any time, but when you go to a "zoo" and it's located right next to a trailer park and a watermelon patch...it's a little different than what you're used to.

We purchased a $3.00 bag of peanuts that we could feed to the animals, so that helped the kids enjoy the zoo. Most of the "dangerous" animals had a PVC tube that ran from the outer fencing layer to the inner one and you could drop peanuts through them for the animals to eat. The bears would put their muzzle up to the end of the pipe when they heard the peanuts sliding down the tube. There was a clever chimp that sat next to the tube and when he saw you put your hand up to drop a peanut, he'd put his hand on the end of the tube to catch it. He had a good system, he'd catch the peanut, put it in his mouth, stick his lips through the fencing to crack the nut, spit the shell out on the ground (outside of his area), and eat the nut. I tried to get him to slip up, but any time he saw my hand go to the pipe, or heard a peanut slide down the tube, he put his hand there to catch them. I even tried waiting until he took his hand away to put the peanut in his mouth to drop one, but as soon as he heard that peanut sliding down the tube, he'd put his hand back.

There was apparently supposed to be a western town and some other things but these were damaged in Hurricane Katrina and not up and running. The people were friendly enough, and my kids had fun, so it's not like I wouldn't recommend it to anyone. I would just say that if you're used to larger, more well-financed zoos, the Mobile Zoo can throw you for a loop.

We went to the big mall in Mobile for the afternoon (Colonial Bell, or something like that). If you've been in one mall, you've been in them all, this one was unspectacular.

We ate at TGI Friday's that evening. We don't have one in Baton Rouge and I've been saying I want to eat there for a while. No real problems there. Tomorrow, our trip to Battleship Park and the USS Alabama.